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This Week with The Chicowitz
"Prophecies of The Chicowitz"

Each week our Boomer-In-Charge, Hershel Chicowitz, has something to say about life, society, or what's going on... from the perspective of a baby boomer. This is what's on his mind the week of March 22:

I guess it is time that I "blew my own horn." 'Cause if I do not, surely no one else will. Lemme give you a hint: Who told you that "Saving Private Ryan" would win the best picture award? And who told you that someone would fly around the world in a balloon in 1999? If you do not remember, then go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200.

Or check my earlier essays; last July, I wrote, "I haven't seen it yet, but Spielberg has done it again. 'Saving Private Ryan' is the movie of the year. No need to even send out any ballots." As I sit here writing this on Sunday afternoon prior to the presentation, I am so certain of my prediction that I am going to send this to the BBHQ publisher even before the Oscar show begins. Why am I so sure... beyond plain, old, annoying arrogance? Well, yesterday I saw "Saving Private Ryan." It is everything they say and more.

And what do they say about it? The two most frequent comments I hear are: first, that the beginning of it is bloody, gory, and horrible; and second, that the vets say that Speilberg has nailed it better than any other war movie.

Stop for a moment.... does that tell you something?

Besides, I am also confident that if, by some strange chance (and who would try to second-guess Hollywood?), "Saving Private Ryan" does not win, the head honchos at BBHQ will pull this essay and subsitute a "Best of the Chicowitz" piece. Of that, I am steadfast in my faith.

Back in July, I wrote, "It amazed me when I heard some people say that [flying around the world in a balloon] is too difficult... it will never be done. Are they nuts? Do they have any understanding of what the 20th century is all about? Apparently not. Not only will it be done; it will be done in 1999."

(Just makes you sick, doesn't it?)

Of course, I also predicted that the Minnesota Vikings would go to the Superbowl. Then again, I suppose, to employ President Clinton's use of words, they might actually have gone to the Superbowl. I think I did see a couple of them in the stands.

I did predict that Denver would win... and for the life of me, I could not name two players on the Denver Broncos. One, yes; but two.... I don't think so. (Elway to come back for another year? Ehhh... I don't have a good feeling about this; but if I had to guess, I would say he will.)

I know that most of you do not want to hear about the presidential race yet, so I will spare you my gloating over that... till next January. But I'll tell you this: the fix is already in.

On the edge of politics, I don't think I am going out on too much of a limb to predict that The Hillary will never spend another night in Arkansas. Them days are over for her. "It's for the children" notwithstanding, when The Hillary moved to Arkansas, the state was 50th in education. When she moved to Washington in 1993, it was 49th. So the First Lady has left her mark. Good Ol' Bill may go back from time to time to relive some past glories, but I don't think he will be reviewing any real estate on the Whitewater River.

OK, it is late Sunday afternoon... I am peering into my crystal ball once again.... what else do I see? A lot of corny jokes by Whoopie Goldberg in the Oscar show.... oh, how I miss Billy Crystal. This Oscar show will start an hour earlier than before... but it will still run past midnight, Eastern time. (Now there's a stretch.)

It's time for the "second season" on television. Beyond the network news and "60 Minutes," I watch about as much TV as I do movies in the theatre. But I gotta' put in a plug for "Sports Night," Tuesay evenings at 9:30 on ABC. It is the best show of the season, and it will win some Emmy awards next Fall. But it may not get renewed, 'cause there is not enough sex, violence, people-of-color, and dysfunctional families on the show. But honest friends, it is terrific! Not so for the upcoming "Norm Show." There is a reason why Norm McDonald left "Saturday Night Live." HE'S NOT FUNNY! Gone by Fall. He and what's his name.... Sam Malone... Cheers... Ted Danson.... will be commiserating together.

Looking ahead... next season.... "NYPD Blue" - last season.

Too bad I am morally against lotteries. Just think, I could be six little numbers away from early retirement. It would be so easy.

Me and my stupid convictions.

See... I managed to make it a whole week without mentioning Monica what's-her-name.




So what do you think?

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If you want to write more, we're open to offerings from other boomers. If you have something to say of interest to boomers, write it as well as you can in 700-900 words, and send it to us. We can't guarantee we'll publish it, but we'll surely consider it.

For more of Hershel's essays, check the BBHQ Archives or the Boomer Essays.




The BBHQ Album of the Month is "Old Friends Live on Stage (Deluxe Edition) (2 CD/1 DVD)," by Simon & Garfunkel. If you were fortunate enough to see them in concert last year, I do not have to sell you. The concert was terrific! This album collection includes 55 songs, plus their new recording, "Citizen of the Planet," and one of the songs sung by the Everly Brothers during the concert. The DVD was recorded during their concert in Madison Square Garden in 2003. For any S&G fan, this is a must have! But then, you knew that already, didn't you?  Old Friends Live on Stage (Deluxe Edition) (2 CD/1 DVD)

The BBHQ Book of the Month is "Vinyl Highway," by Dee Dee Phelps. You remember her as Dee Dee, of Dick and Dee Dee. Together, they took a decade long ride on the rock and roll roller coaster. It was a heck of a ride! Dick Clark, Quincy Jones, the Beach Boys, Glenn Campbell, Dionne Warwick, Bobby Vinton... Dick and Dee Dee rubbed shoulders with all of them. This is her "behind the scenes" story. It's pretty cool.

Click here for more information, or here to visit the BBHQ Library.

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rev. 03/24/99