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Several people have written to BBHQ suggesting that we do something for single boomers. I can understand that; I am single, and believe me, I could use all the help I can get. But I am not sure what BBHQ can do to assist the single boomers across the Internet.
I guess we could set up a chat room where we could all sit around and whine. But frankly, I do enough whining for all of us. So if you want to whine at great length, you'll have to do it somewhere else. I am reminded of that old country song:
"We got a five dollar fine.... for whining;
we'll tell you before you come in.
If it ain't on your mind... to have a good time;
y'all come back and see us again."
You can listen to a sample here:
I suppose we could set up some kind of online match-making service. But after some out-right embarrassing experiences with such services, I can tell you that there are far worse things than being alone on a Saturday night. Believe me!
So I was ready to drop the idea when I saw a news story about some guy in Minnesota who was planning to get married on June 13. Now, I'm all for marriages; personally, I always cry at weddings. But the problem with this event is that, 24 hours before it was to take place, there was no bride; the groom had no one in mind. His friends had held a nationwide search, conducted interviews, and were selecting his soul mate for him. He had no idea who he was going to marry till he lifted up the veil.
But wait; it gets worse. A reasonably attractive and articulate female in St. Petersburg, Florida was flying up to Minnesota to be interviewed for the position... if that's the right word for it. (According to her, "People have gotten married for a hell of a lot worse reasons than this." Worse than: "oh, I just thought I'd fly to Minnesota and offer to marry a complete stranger"? Whew!) And her father was accompanying her so he would be there to walk her down the aisle if she were selected! She had a wedding dress and everything. This little excursion into the twilight zone was going to cost them $4,000... win or lose!
This sounds like the plot for a horribly lame episode of "Men Behaving Badly." But it is the real world; these people are serious about this! I am not questioning their right to do this. This is not about rights; it is about common sense and sanity, and the lack of respect for the social institutions that make up our society. Everybody seems to be treating this as if it were just another natural lifestyle choice, much akin to ordering a pizza delivery from Dominos.
That is what I object to. I believe strongly in marriage; I believe it is a sacred institution. And as much disgrace as our first boomer commander-in-chief brought upon the institution of marriage, this pathetic exhibition is even more disgusting. What in the world would make anyone think this is going to work? Well, network television I guess. Or maybe the objective isn't the marriage at all; maybe it is just a desperate cry for fifteen minutes of fame. And if that is the case, we are in even more trouble than I had thought. If you really need the attention that badly, do something else; but don't drag down the institution of marriage because of your shortcomings.
And you wonder why our kids have so little respect for us? Look no further.
The newspapers and the networks share some of the responsibility for this. This is no more a news story than is belching in public. At least the belch in public doesn't hurt anyone, and won't eventually involve a feeding frenzy of greedy lawyers... at least, I don't think so.
The wedding took place at the Mall of America in Minneapolis. I suppose it is only fitting. The three major networks reported the story on the evening news. The groom's mother was there to celebrate the event with her son. The father stayed home and refused to be interviewed. Thank goodness there is still some small shred of dignity left in this country.
And I suppose next week we'll see the happy couple profiled on Inside Edition and American Journal, and interviewed on Rosie O'Donnell's show. Oh, I still have enough confidence in Ted Koppel to think that he'll pass on this golden opportunity to examine this particular sour slice of Americana.
So, shame on the groom; shame on the prospective bride, and even more shame on her father. Somebody ought to know better. I don't think that's asking for too much.
And the saddest part is that I haven't heard anyone else talk about how irresponsible and stupid this is. We are teaching our kids how to use condoms and how easy it is to get an abortion. We have taught them that a child doesn't need both a mother and a father - certainly does not need their consent to get an abortion - and that the government - not the parent - is responsible for day care, midnight basketball, and school lunches. But apparently we have not taught them the first thing about choosing a life-long mate. So please, don't write and ask me how things got so screwed up.
Deep down inside, I think that most of us think this is nutty - at least I hope so. But how are our kids supposed to know that this is not a behavior they should emulate? It is a free country (more or less), but if we do not want this to become part of our pop culture, I think we have to speak out against it and let everyone know what we think and why we think so. So ask your kids what they think of it. Ask them if they would want to get married under such circumstances. Ask them what they think is important in selecting a mate. Tell them what you think. Both of you might learn something.
So this is not another bash Clinton essay; it is a bash us essay. We have been too complacent for too long, and the result is all around us. As Pogo said, we have met the enemy... and he is us.
But that still doesn't address the requests of those who have written to BBHQ asking us to do something for single boomers. All it does is tell you what not to do. So I am open to suggestions. And if you are a single, attractive, intelligent, female boomer with your feet firmly planted on the ground... well, you know how to reach me. We're not all looking for mail-order brides... but we are looking.
If you want to write more, we're open to offerings from other boomers. If you have something to say of interest to boomers, write it as well as you can in 500-800 words, and send it to us. We can't guarantee we'll publish it, but we'll surely consider it.
Hershel will have something else to say on Monday, June 22; mark your calendar to come back to BBHQ every Monday.
| The BBHQ Album of the Month is "Old Friends Live on Stage (Deluxe Edition) (2 CD/1 DVD)," by Simon & Garfunkel. If you were fortunate enough to see them in concert last year, I do not have to sell you. The concert was terrific! This album collection includes 55 songs, plus their new recording, "Citizen of the Planet," and one of the songs sung by the Everly Brothers during the concert. The DVD was recorded during their concert in Madison Square Garden in 2003. For any S&G fan, this is a must have! But then, you knew that already, didn't you? |
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The BBHQ Book of the Month is
"Vinyl Highway," by
Dee Dee Phelps. You remember her as Dee Dee, of Dick and Dee Dee.
Together, they took a decade long ride on the rock and roll roller
coaster. It was a heck of a ride! Dick Clark, Quincy Jones, the Beach
Boys, Glenn Campbell, Dionne Warwick, Bobby Vinton... Dick and Dee Dee
rubbed shoulders with all of them. This is her "behind the scenes" story.
It's pretty cool.
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Copyright © 1998-2008 Baby Boomer HeadQuarters (BBHQ) All rights reserved.
rev. 11/29/98